Ungodly Counsel
by David J. Stewart
"Blessed is the man that walketh not in the counsel of the ungodly..." -Psalm 1:1
I felt the urgency to write this article because of the skyrocketing divorce rate. It is tragic that so many divorces are caused by ungodly counseling which a wife receives when she is at odds with her husband. Oftentimes this ungodly advice comes from other feminist women at shelters, from layers, from friends, from mothers, or even from carnal people at church. The marriage is under attack nowadays more than ever. If a wife is not totally committed to her husband and to being loyal to her marriage VOWS (promises), then she is likely to destroy her own marriage by filing for divorce, involving a lawyer, or hurting her husband (Proverb 14:1, "Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands"). Oh how America is plagued with foolish women who divorce their husbands and destroy their homes.
Articles like this guarantee that I'll receive e-mails from angry feminist women, but the truth needs to be said. Women need to learn to DO NOTHING when they're angry at their husbands. When your decision maker is broken...don't make decisions! The judges, lawyers, and other "professional" people involved in your divorce don't care if you throw your marriage away, they just want the money. It's everyday business as usual to them. Many of them are divorced themselves and out of spite want all the company they can get, so they readily advice others to divorce, divorce, divorce. Well, divorce is a horrible wicked sin!
Marriage is NOT an agreement, it is a commitment. When you were married, you made promises to God and to your spouse (for better, for worse; in sickness, and in health; for richer, for poorer; 'til death do us part...and for you wives, "to obey"). Increasingly, people don't even think twice about breaking their marriage vows (what's one more sin, right?). American society has been desensitized concerning the sinfulness of sin. Whereas homosexuality used to be a sin, now it's called an "alternate lifestyle." Whereas drunkenness used to be called a sin, now it's mislabeled as "Chemical dependency." But bless God, sin is still sin! Alcoholism is a sin! Homosexuality is a sin! Abortion is a sin! Gambling is a sin! Hollywood movies are a sin! And divorce is an wicked dirty rotten sin!!!
God hates divorce. Hebrews 13:5 teaches that God NEVER forsakes or leaves His own. How sad that so many professed "Christians" willingly forsake their own spouse during the "for worse" times of the marriage. It's wrong! It's wicked! I don't care what your husband or wife does, you have NO RIGHT to break your wedding vows. Do you know what the hallmark character trait of a great Christian is? They stay! They don't quit! They never forsake their God, their wife, their friends, etc. We are living in a spoiled generation of adult brats who complain and gossip about everything. Whaaah!...He got a banana, but I only got an orange. Whaaah!...I didn't like the way she looked at me. I'm not kidding, the American people are borderline clinically paranoid these days. Everyone has lawyers and lawsuits on their mind. Everyone has been brainwashed by the government and news media to fear walking down the street. Everyone is stressed out about so many things. What ever happened to the simple good old days. Think about it...100 years ago people had time to enjoy life, before the modern age of mass communication and travel. Nowadays, with all of the modern-day conveniences, no one has time to do anything anymore. How ironic!
In these last days, a husband and wife need to be STRONG in the Lord and in their knowledge of God's Word. Especially you wives who like to run to shelters when you get angry at your husband. You are often walking in the counsel of the ungodly in such places. You are amongst other wives who are angry at their husbands and are "experts" on how to hurt your husband and "fix him good." These parasitic home wreckers viciously prey upon tired and mentally weak wives who just need a break from life. A marriage these days has MUCH pressure. With manufacturing jobs fleeing the country, wages decreasing, bills increasing, insurance coverage decreasing, premiums increasing, the workplace becoming increasingly hostile (especially towards Christians), little whores everywhere dressing like they're too poor to afford clothes, and so much more...it can create a lot of tension in a marriage.
If you are reading this article, then I plead with you to renew your marriage vows with God and your spouse. Simply tell your spouse, "I love you and just want you to know that I'm with you for the rest of your life." Don't say it if you don't mean it! Don't you dare say these words and then run out the door next week. By the way, I think it is pathetic that a wife can run out the door every time the going gets tough, but a husband has nowhere to run from his job, pressures, frustrations, or a troublesome wife who won't fulfill her marriage duties. It's just not fair. The feminists demand equal rights, but only when it's convenient for them. Where are the men's shelters? Where can a man run to get away from all the pressures of life? Suicide? A man has no place to run, but there are shelters all across America where women can run to (and they do). It is an obvious testimony as to the foolishness of feminism. The fact is that women need shelters because they are the weaker sex (1st Peter 3:7).
Furthermore, there are Public Defender offices all across America that will help a women get a divorce for free, but the man has to pay $15,000 for a lawyer to defend himself. Don't you understand?...the whole American system is setup to destroy your marriage and your family. Satan loves divorce. The best way to destroy a home is to attack the weakest area...the wife. If Satan can destroy the mother, then it's easy to ruin the husband. You women are being targeted by Satan in an attempt to destroy your husbands. Divorce is a primary cause of adulterous relationships and apostasy. I recently received an e-mail from a women who's first husband divorced her and then married another. She was devastated so she married a man who had been divorced twice already seeking companionship. She said he was abusive so she divorced her second husband. Then she writes me asking if it's ok to remarry. I told her she sinned by leaving her second husband and needs to go back to him. If he's abusive, then he needs help. She surely does not have to live with an abusive husband, but she is commanded by God not to divorce him. There is NOT one Scripture in the entire Bible that gives a wife permission to divorce an abusive husband. And I'll say something else here, a lot of woman greatly exaggerate the term "abuse." Like I said, we are living in a spoiled rotten generation of little adult brats who complain about everything. Just because your husband cancels your credit card is NOT abuse.
Are you walking in the counsel of the ungodly? Are you running to these shelters in an emotional panic, looking for sympathy? What about your husband? Do you clean the house? Do you love him? Do you tell him you love him? I worked with a man who said his wife NEVER says "I love you." That is not good. If a husband and wife are not best of friends after 10 years of marriage...then something is very wrong. This does not mean that there won't be fights and problems, it just means that you should both be closer to each other than anyone else. Nothing is worse than a wife being closer to her mother, pastor, or a friend more than her own husband. It is disloyalty as far as I'm concerned. A wife should have eyes for her husband only in every way. By the way ladies, NEVER allow any man other than your husband to place his hand on your shoulder (or anywhere). It is wrong. Protect what belongs to your husband. And you husbands do the same.
I didn't write this article to be unkind, and I'm certainly not a male chauvinist. I have simply noticed over the years that many wives run to shelters and are subject to godless wicked advice from total losers that are destroying their own marriages. Wake up! If you really want to get mad ladies, then know this...your own government deliberately created the feminist movement to destabilize society and convince you to murder your own baby through an abortion. Chinese women weren't as gullible, so their government forced them to stop having children by sterilization and mandatory killings. In contrast, the American women were enraged when they were told that their body didn't belong to them, so they demanded the RIGHT to be able to get an abortion (and they got it in 1972). So while American women continue to eagerly murder their children in the name of "women's rights," Chinese women are prohibited from having more than two children or else face deadly consequences. Either way, the population is reduced. By the way, population reduction is also a sin. There is plenty of land and food in this world. God never taught us to stop having children. Do the math and you'll find that every human being on the planet could fit into the state of Texas. The problem is evil government and the greed of mankind.
So ladies, be careful...that's all I'm saying. Don't sacrifice your future on the alter of the immediate. Think! If your husband has physically beat you, then you both need counseling and help. Most husbands get angry for a reason. I'm not condoning domestic violence at all, I'm just saying that wives are often to blame for their husbands anger in the first place. You BOTH need counseling, a referee. If a wife won't cook, clean, or do her duties...what can the husband do? Where can he turn? He can't. He can't write his wife up or suspend her. He can't fire her for poor job performance. So what does a husband do? A loving husband will try to help her. A loving husband will try to find a way to make things better. But your husband is a human being too and he will get angry sometimes (most husbands do). Then when his wife runs out the door, the husband is looked down upon by others as the bad guy...an abusive husband. Women who run to shelters are automatically treated as "victims," but what about the husband at home who patiently asks his wife month after month to clean her house and cook him some nutritious meals (but she doesn't). She doesn't work a job outside the home, and doesn't do her work inside the home. This is very wrong and an injustice towards her family. All across America, hardworking men are often the silent victims of wives who won't be a mother to their children or a wife to their husband. Please don't misunderstand me, domestic violence is evil and wicked in every form; but it's high time for wives to start being honest with themselves and accepting their share of blame for their husband's anger. What makes your husband mad? What have you done to reconcile the matter? You have no right to demonize your husband if you're not fulfilling your responsibilities as a loyal and hard-working wife. A lot of women make their husbands angry by spending too much time on the phone. Ladies, stay off the phone! You probably gossip too much already.
If you're angry with your husband, that is ok; but not a divorce. You don't need a lawyer. As my pastor used to say, "If either one of you were a good Christian, then this wouldn't be happening." It takes two to tango. Let it go. Let it go. Let it go. Love your spouse, forgive. Do you know that Jesus told Peter that he is supposed to forgive his brother seven times seventy. That's 490 times a day! In other words, unlimited forgiveness. If you're afraid to go home, ok...but no divorce! Give it time, ask your husband to meet you at a private counseling session with your pastor or someone you can trust (someone older who's had a successful marriage over the years). Respect your husband's desire for privacy. Few husbands want to go for counseling. Make it easier for him. Look ladies, arguments are a part of being married. Hopefully, you can both learn to COMMUNICATE more to avoid arguments. The biggest problem in many marriages is a lack of communication. Feelings are like a boiling steam kettle, if you don't let the steam out...it will come out one way or another. Why wait until your pot boils over? Talk to your husband now, give him a heads up. Give him a chance to make things right before you call out the National Guard. I believe it is sinful for a wife to hide things from her husband, things that he would want to know about. It undermines a marriage relationship when a couple hides things from each other. How sad that so many spouses have lost their trust for each other. Some wives even have a secret bank account at the advice of their meddling mother or a feminist friend who keep advising her what to do when the marriage fails (and it probably will). Too many men and women have a "one foot already out the door attitude." We should never plan for failure when it comes to our marriage commitment.
The bottom line is that we are commanded in the Bible not to walk in the counsel of the ungodly (Psalm 1:1). Divorce is ungodly advice. I once heard a pastor say that he has never recommended for anyone to get a divorce, but he clapped when some people did. That was wrong for him to say that. I would never rejoice over ANY divorce. Sadly, marriage has become more of an economic vehicle these days for people to ride upon (two jobs = more money). Many women who are seeking a husband want to know how much money he has in the bank, where he works, and what he has to offer her. No wonder so many marriages are failing. What ever happened to genuine love?
I knew a young Christian women who wanted to marry into money. She had developed a bitter attitude towards authority. She decided to have sexual relations with a professional hockey player she had met. He was already married. This young foolish woman sincerely thought the man would run off with her and leave his wife. Foolish young girl...he had his pleasure defiling her and then moved on. That young woman had a nervous breakdown which lasted for years. She had given her virginity to a pig. How tragic! How wicked! Oh how America needs men of God to preach the Word of God once again from it's pulpits, on the streets, on the internet, in newspapers, everywhere a voice can be heard for God. Where are the men of God?
Proverb 24:16 declares, "For a just man falleth seven times, and riseth up again: but the wicked shall fall into mischief." The Apostle Paul affirmed to us that a marriage will have troubles (1st Corinthians 7:28). The key is to get back up when the dust settles and the smoke clears and NEVER QUIT. The word "fall" in Proverb 24:16 is mentioned twice. The first time it means to trip, to stumble, to mess up. The second time it means to deliberately quit. A Christian WILL mess up, sin, and make a mess of things at times in their life...but they always get back up and move on for the Lord. In contrast, the Bible teaches that the wicked purposely quit, they don't even try to do the right thing, they don't care, they give up and go into permanent sin. A Christian will have problems in their marriage, but they won't divorce. The wicked don't care, they throw in the towel and quit. To file for divorce is to commit a great wickedness in the sight of God. Come hell, wind, or high water...you hang in there! Perhaps none of this makes any sense to you, but this is God's way...to honor your marriage vows..."'Til death do us part." You made a promise to God and your spouse. It doesn't matter if you were married in city hall or a church, God still expects you to keep your promises.
I've written this article for one reason, to try to save some marriages. You ladies listen...don't divorce your man. You hang in there! You get tough! You sit him down and straighten him out in love. There is nothing wrong with a wife being assertive and giving her husband a firm talking to. If your husband won't listen, then have your pastor (or another understanding man) call him. Men can be stubborn. If he's a bully, then you may need to leave him for awhile, but call him a couple times a week and reassure your love for him. If you do go to a shelter, tell the other women to shut up. I know marriages problems can be very emotional and difficult, but divorce is never the right thing to do. That is all I am saying....don't do it.
"Blessed is the man that walketh not in the counsel of the ungodly..." -Psalm 1:1