I Sincerely Need Your Prayers
PRAISE GOD ANYHOW!

By David J. Stewart | June 2011

       James 5:13, “Is any among you afflicted? let him pray.” I am compelled to pray continually because I am overwhelmed by bodily affliction. I am enduring. I am afflicted much on a daily basis by my damaged spinal cord in my neck. I have been told that I hide it well, and I try; but only God knows the physical affliction that I suffer day and night.

The neck pain is so bad at times that I have to close my eyes to concentrate when I'm talking to people, and that freaks some people out. It is lonely suffering in so much pain when so few people truly grasp what I'm dealing with. I feel burning and tingling from my neck down both arms and both legs throughout the day. It is a heavy burden to say the least.

There's not a day since 2004 that I haven't suffered in pain because of the problems in my neck, and the failed 2nd neck surgery in 2010 made me 100% worse. Some people think it's just as easy as walking into a health clinic and saying, “fix my neck,” but it doesn't work that way. I've met with 7 neurosurgeons since 2004 and four said nothing would help me, and 2 of the other 3 did ACDF surgery. It's not like I can just keep going to neurosurgeons. I wish I knew who to see, where to go, or what to do; but all I can do is choose a surgeon with a good record and several years of experience and trust the Lord to see me through. That's what I did and it didn't help. The 2nd surgery made me 100% worse. Yet, under the same circumstances I'd get the same 2nd surgery all over again because of the chronic pain, neck stiffness, and problems in my limbs (mostly the right side). The 1st surgery in 2009 did nothing to help me.

It is a heavy burden to endure, please pray for me often.

I have received so much advise from people. One says go here. The other says go there. I can only go to so many hospitals and clinics. Unfortunately I can't go to all of them in hopes of finding the right one, because you don't know until after you've had surgery. Even the doctors are divided on everything. Everybody has their favorite place to go. I have been bounced around like a ping pong ball and no one in the health system truly seems to care. It's just another day at work to them. It's been an uphill struggle all the way and I'm worse off now, and suffering more than before.

The insurance company only pays for so much and it VERY hard to get surgery, especially after you've already had 2 surgeries. There's a ton of paperwork and someone's got to pay the bill. Since that surgery I have had burning in my arms and legs that I didn't have before, and the tingling is 100% worse, and a feeling of weakness all the time. Thankfully, I am fully functional, although limited.

Pastor Lector Roloff used to have a sign on his desk that read... “PRAISE GOD ANYHOW!” So I praise God anyhow as Brother Lester Roloff used to always say. PRAISE GOD ANYHOW!

I have a limp when I walk because my legs, mostly the right side feels partially asleep.

As I type the aching pain in the bony area of the back of my neck is absolutely horrible. I've taken 80 mg. of Oxycontin and two Percocet 10/325's so far today and I need to take more, unfortunately. I usually take 120 mg. of Oxycontin per day and 3 Percocet 10/325's for break through pain (which I have every day, mostly as the day progresses). The more pain meds you take, the less effective they are; so when I cut back the pain is unbearable. Thus, I am always cycling my pain medications (suffering worse in cycles as well). I stack my meds so they'll help me more when I need them most toward the end of the day. I don't even open the pill bottles anymore, I just pour a pile onto my desk because I take them so much. Pain meds are the only thing that enable me to do anything. I thank God for them.

I've had people sincerely advise me to eat more fruits and vegetables and stop taking the pain medications. They have no idea what they're talking about. Yes, fruits and vegetables are great, but you can't just stop taking pain meds when you're suffering in chronic constant pain. I'd end up in the emergency room. Only God knows the level of pain I feel in my neck. Without the opiate based prescription medications I cannot

I have had many people over the years sincerely tell me about alternative remedies for pain, meditation remedies, or to eat fruits and vegetables, et cetera. They mean well, but NOTHING helps alleviate pain like opiate based medications, from which heroin is derived. I've taken prescription Ibuprofen, Methadone, Percodan, Percocet, Morphine Sulfate, Dilaudid, Fentanyl Patches, et cetera; but nothing completely works. The Dilaudid when taken with Percocet and Oxycontin, made my feet swell up so much that I couldn't fit my slippers on anymore. So I stopped taking the Dilaudid in December of 2010.

The withdrawal symptoms were absolutely horrible. I took short hot baths every hour to get through it, because my skin was highly sensitive and sore from head to toe. I felt emotionally overwhelmed, like the world was coming to an end. I wanted to die and felt like it was happening. I ate popcorn and munchies to distract my mind, because when you're going through withdrawal symptoms every minute seems like an hour, and every hour an eternity. I walked around as much as I could to take my mind off the withdrawal effects. Kicking Dilaudid in VERY difficult. I had 75% of the 2 dozen listed withdrawal effects at http://www.dilaudid-addiction.com/dilaudid-withdrawals.html.

I learned that Oxycontin and Percocet are similar chemically, using Oxycodone; but Dilaudid is completely different. In fact, all Oxycontin means is OXYCODONE + CONTINUOUS RELEASE. That's where the word came from. It's a time-release of Oxycodone (lasting 6-8 hours); whereas Percocet is fairly immediate (lasting 2 hours at the most) and contains Tylenol (a lethal drug in doses of more than 4,000 mg. a day). I never go over 1,000 mg. a day now, but at one time was taking 8-10 Percocet 10/325's per day for 2-years prior to my 1st surgery in 2009. Blood tests haven't shown any liver damage.

I need your constant prayers. A lot of people don't understand what it's like to suffer in constant pain, and most people simply don't care. The world is a very selfish place, which is why Philippians 2:21 says most people don't care about the THINGS WHICH ARE JESUS CHRIST'S. Caring for the things of Christ is directly proportional to caring for others as well. You can't be right with God and wrong with your neighbor. Philippians 2:5 tells us to Let this mind be in you, which was also in Christ Jesus. What mind is that? We find out in Verses 3-4...

Philippians 2:3-4, “Let nothing be done through strife or vainglory; but in lowliness of mind let each esteem other better than themselves. Look not every man on his own things, but every man also on the things of others.”

Wow! The Bible teaches for us to view other people as being better than ourselves. Even the Lord Jesus thought this way. This is exactly what Philippians 2:5 says is the mind of Christ. Jesus washed His disciple's dirty feet. Jesus was a servant. Jesus taught that the greatest among us is the one who serves the others. Jesus looked upon the needs and concerns of others.

Most people view others as being lower than themselves, which is sinful pride. Only by sinful pride does one gossip, slander, or talk evil about another person (Proverb 13:10, “Only by pride cometh contention...”). Our Lord Jesus Christ esteemed others better than Himself, and looked upon the things of others as a humble servant. What a precious Savior!

There is hatred everywhere we turn these days. People have become so sinfully proud, arrogant, high-minded, selfish, false accusers, greedy, malign, vindictive, insane, unthankful, deceptive, perverted, dirty-minded, phony, self-righteous, corrupt, idolatrous, covetous, boozers, sexually immoral, dishonest, murderous, indifferent, and wicked. Wickedness and madness always go hand-in-hand. These are perilous times as 2nd Timothy 3:1-5 foretold; not seen since the time of Noah, just as Jesus Christ said in Matthew 24:37-39. Everyone wants to eat, drink, marry, and party nowadays; but hardly anyone cares about the things which are Jesus Christ's (Philippians 2:21); and most people are on their way to Hell, fire, and damnation in their sins (Matthew 7:13-14; 2nd Thessalonians 1:8-9; Revelation 20:15; John 8:24).

Perhaps the greatest sin of all is indifference, that is, not caring one way or the other, particularly concerning the things which are Christ's. Jesus said that the generation who perished in the flood, “KNEW NOT UNTIL THE FLOOD CAME, AND TOOK THEM ALL AWAY... so shall also the coming of the Son of man be” (Matthew 24:39). The greatest sin of the people who went to Hell in Noah's time was not caring about anything except eating, drinking, having sex, and making merriment while life was good. Nearly every place one goes these days in America, there are garbage pails and dumpsters filled with beer cans, beer cans, and more beer cans. Americans are beer drinking buffoons!

I ask not for your prayers for myself, but for Christ's sake, that this ministry may continue to be blessed and used for the Lord. All I've ever asked from anyone is for their prayers, and that is all I'll ever ask. My reward is in Heaven (Matthew 6:20). According to the Bible I am a wealthy man indeed, because 1st Peter 1:7 says that the TRIAL OF OUR FAITH is worth MUCH MORE (not just more, but MUCH MORE) than gold. Gold sells for well over $1,000 an ounce. God says that all of our trials, tribulations, and turmoil in life are worth more than gold. 1st Peter 1:7, “That the trial of your faith, being much more precious than of gold that perisheth, though it be tried with fire, might be found unto praise and honour and glory at the appearing of Jesus Christ.”

This truth is one of the DEEP THINGS OF GOD that 1st Corinthians 2:10 speaks of, which are taught to us by the Spirit of God abiding within every believer (Romans 8:9). The heathen world cannot even begin to comprehend how one's problems, sufferings, and miseries could be of more value than gold (which can buy them a new car, boat, mansion, limitless personal possessions, vacations galore, jewelry, fine dining, cruise ship voyages, traveling the world, and everything else that rich people do with their money). God says that all of our burdens are much more valuable than anything gold can buy. Why you ask? We find the answer in 2nd Corinthians 12:9, “And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.” God has never had a child too weak to be made use of, but He has had many too strong to be used for the cause of Christ.

Until a person is afflicted with endless pain, they naturally can't relate to such suffering and can't possibly understand. They just can't. I know what's it's like to be outside on a beautiful day with the sun shining, and everybody is enjoying life and having a good time; but everything physically within my body is afflicting me and it overshadows me.

I suffer alone every day of my life, trusting God to see me through to another day. Unfortunately I just can't handle e-mails anymore, and I apologize to those who want to communicate with me. We'll have plenty of time up in Heaven, and I believe that time will be very soon. God's grace is the only answer (Hebrews 4:15-16). I have endured the Devil afflicting me ever since my ministry began to grow in 2004. Only the Lord knows the depth of suffering that I've endured. Job didn't have it so bad. I have a Friend in Heaven and that is my hope. Jesus is precious!

Philippians 2:13, “For it is God which worketh in you both to will and to do of his good pleasure.”

I ask for your earnest prayers for this ministry and me daily. This ministry is much bigger than me, it's about the Lord Jesus Christ, Who is THE WAY, THE TRUTH, and THE LIFE (John 14:6)! HEAR YE HIM!

“Even so, come, Lord Jesus” (Revelation 22:20).

I love you all in the Lord, whoever you may be!

Tomorrow's Guarantee of God's Provision

1st Thessalonians 5:25, “Brethren, pray for us.”