by David J. Stewart
"Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new." -2nd Corinthians 5:17
That's
correct! The Christian life is all about changing. Throughout life,
I've often heard people make foolish statements about refusing to change.
How many times have you heard someone say, "I've been this way all my life and
I'm not about to change now." That's fine if it's something that shouldn't
be changed. However, there are always areas of improvement in everyone's
life. No one has arrived! The bottom line is that we should always
be looking for areas in our life which need improvement, and then ask the Lord
to help us mature in those areas. Let's look at a few Scriptures...
"Who can understand his errors? cleanse thou me from secret faults." -Psalm 19:12
David's prayer was for the Lord to help him realize his unrealized faults. It's always hardest to analyze ourselves. It's a lot easier to find fault in others isn't it? Sure it is. Humans are so prone to be hypocritical about this type of stuff. Let's face it--No One Likes To Be Wrong! Howbeit, as believers, we must allow the Holy Spirit to speak to us through His Word and make the appropriate and necessary changes in our life. No one likes to change, we are creatures of habit. Some people would rather die than change. As believers upon Jesus Christ, we must decide in our hearts and minds that it is good to change if we are wrong about something; but this is useless if we don't search our hearts on a regular basis, asking God (as King David did) to cleanse us from our self-righteous faults and sins. What is in your skeleton closet? The Bible teaches that we cannot prosper if we are not honest about our sins.
"He that covereth his sins shall not prosper: but whoso confesseth and forsaketh them shall have mercy." -Proverb 28:13
Search deep into your heart and ask yourself...how do I treat
the people in my daily life? Am I honest? Do I respect my wife as an
individual (her feelings and rights as a person)? Do I submit to my
husband and am I a "help meet" to him?
Am I reliable? Am I fair with my children? Do I respect my children?
Do I treat people the way I want to be treated? Do I pray? Do I
meditate upon God's Word day and night? Is God's Holy Word just a Book in
my life, or is It "The Book?" There are hundreds of similar questions you
could ask yourself. The bottom line is that we need to continually monitor
ourselves spiritually by comparing ourselves to the word of God. Every
believer needs to develop a habit of asking the Holy Spirit if there's anything
in our life that needs to be bettered. Surely, there always is. What changes need to be made in your life?
A Tragic Life
I want to tell you a sad story about an older man (in his 60's) I once knew. He was an abusive man, often yelling at his own wife and adult kids when they visited. His grandchildren didn't want to be around him because he was so mean all the time (and unpredictably violent). He had been a total tyrant all during the years when his children were growing up. He was a monster to his family. This man upon one occasion assaulted his wife, splitting her eye open with a flashlight and put her in the hospital. The children were forced to lie to the police, saying the mother fell baking a cake. On another occasion, he kicked her in the shins so she couldn't walk for one month. He would throw food at her when he didn't like it and whip beer cans across the room at her head when he became angry at her. Believe it or not, this man was a minister of the gospel. He was a minister before he ever married or had his first child. Sadly, he never did grow in the Lord. He preached the gospel of Jesus Christ, but was a sinister minister (a demon) to his family at home! Do you think God was pleased with him? I think not. He was saved, but only "as by fire."
He escaped the fires of hell by getting saved, but he refused to submit to the Holy Spirit's conviction. He grew a little in the Lord at first when he was saved, but then became complacent and chose to dwell in the land of Sodom for the rest of his life. He often swore at his children, slapping them and even on one occasion... threw a can of paint stripper at his son... burning him. These are but a few of his hundreds of abuses and mistreatments. This man, still an ordained minister, now old and broken, passed up all the decades of opportunities he had to repent of his abusive ways. He never did change! He would often say, "I'm too old to change" or "I'm too set in my ways to change now." He blamed his abusive ways on his health, his problems, his age, his upbringing...excuses, excuses, excuses! He could do everything that normal people could do (drive a car, balance a check-book, go fishing, play chess, etc.), but when it came to properly treating other people... he said he was too old and sick. He had a viscous hot-temper which he never did gain the victory over. He became so angry one day that he poured bleach over his wife's head while she sat crippled in a wheel-chair. This was after 30 years of marriage to that poor woman. This guy is a pastor, a preacher, and let me add... a poor excuse for a man; but he is still a man that God loves and died on the cross for. How happy do you think he will be at the judgment seat of Christ? He is in trouble with the Lord.
"That no man go beyond and defraud his brother in any matter: because that the Lord is the avenger of all such, as we also have forewarned you and testified." -1st Thessalonians 4:6
How sad! How tragic! How could someone know the Lord Jesus Christ personally and still live like the Devil decade after decade (and be an ordained minister, with a degree from a Christian college, on top of it)? I sometimes here preachers say that becoming a Christian will make you better person... and then I think of the guy I just told you about. I don't think so! You see, there are honest, decent, hard-working unsaved people in this world; and there are also rotten, crooked, lazy, horrible saved people as well. Becoming a believer doesn't automatically change anyone, there is supposed to be a growing in grace process (1st Peter 2:2). God expects us to change and He is willing to help us change. Read the verse below...
"But we all, with open face beholding as in a glass the glory of the Lord, are changed into the same image from glory to glory, even as by the Spirit of the Lord." -2nd Corinthians 3:18
Notice the verse we just read; It tells us that the Holy Spirit of God will change us. How? We must focus upon the Lord Jesus Christ in His Word. God's Holy Spirit will guide us into all Truth and the Truth will set us free. The bottom line is that we must want to change. If we want to change, the Word of God WILL change us if we'll let it. Do you hunger and thirst for righteousness in your life? Do you want a closer walk with the God of the universe? Do you want to mature in the Lord? We must grow up spiritually!
People don't always
change immediately when they become saved, sometimes they hardly change at all. Yes, the Lord Jesus Christ
comes into our heart, and we do become a new creature in Christ because we have
been born-again, but there is a growing process that will continue the rest
of our earthly lives. How fast we grow depends upon us. Some people
change drastically when they get saved, others change very little. God
deals with each person individually and we need to be careful about trying to do
the Holy Spirit's job. It is not our job to convict and judge people.
Reconciliation with God and Man
When you hurt someone... you have two people to make it right with:
1) The person you sinned against
2) God
The Bible makes clear that you can't be right with God until you make it right with the person you sinned against...
"Leave there thy gift before the altar, and go thy way; first be reconciled to thy brother, and then come and offer thy gift." -Matthew 5:24
Many believers think they are right with the Lord, but in fact are living in sin and denial. If there is a wrong you haven't righted, you need to do something to try to right it. You need to go to that person and ask for their forgiveness, righting the wrong if possible. Sometimes the person you wronged won't accept your apology, but at least you have done your part. But let me add, you had better have done what you can do to right the wrong. If you cheat someone out of some money, don't expect them to accept your apology if you haven't paid them back. God will take their side, you cheated them. Justice is a balancing of the scales. Jesus Christ balanced heaven's scales of justice when He died on the cross and shed His blood. The believer is at perfect peace with God concerning salvation. However, that doesn't balance the scales of justice between me and you if I sin against you. The scales must be balanced if there is to be justice! This is why 1st Thessalonians 4:6 warns us not to defraud our brother in any matter. This is why Romans 12:19 promises us that God will repay those who have wronged us. We will be avenged at the judgment seat of Christ. Repentance is a change of heart that leads to a change of life. The change of heart is the godly sorrow we just read about...and godly sorrow leadeth to repentance! If we truly repent, we will seek to balance the scales of justice with those we have wronged (just like Ebenezer Scrooge did in "A Christmas Carol"). I think this is a good example of how a believer should act when we are right with the Lord.
The sinister minister I told you about earlier never did make things right with
his family... his kids can't stand him... his wife is dead. Kindly said,
he's a dead-beat
neo-evangelical minister. He is not a soul-winner. He makes light of
the King James Bible. He cares little for truth in doctrine. He's a
miserable old man, stuck on himself. Such a sad testimony! He has
his money, but that's all he has. He's a saved man! He is a
minister! For all his 36 years of marriage, he would apologize when the police
came to the house or his wife left with the children. Unfortunately, he
was not sorry to the Lord...his apologies were just cheap talk. After
arguments, he would often say to his wife, "We're on a new
honey-moon." This usually lasted until the next full moon. It wouldn't be a week and he would be abusing her
again. He would apologize to pacify the moment, but go back to being an
unholy terror to the family within days. He never did find that
"godly sorrow that worketh repentance." This heathen man needed
to change, but never did. He had the Lord in his heart, but chose to let
sin reign instead of the Holy Spirit.
Even Believers Can Become Hardhearted
It's been said, "The same sun that melts the wax, hardens the clay." I believe this is true even for some believers. A believer who holds out on God and refuses to change may eventually deteriorate further into becoming a very rebellious and hard-hearted person. Such is the case with this minister who was abusive. I cannot think of a better example of what every believer should NOT be than the man I have told you about--selfish, self-centered, self-righteous and self-conscious. He thought the world centered around him. He thought he was the only person in the world having problems. It was his way or the highway. He didn't care about the hardships of others, only himself. Such a sad testimony! He helped people when he felt like it, not when they needed it. I've only shared the testimony of this man in hopes that it will help others NOT to follow in the same footsteps. Rather, we should exemplify Jesus Christ in our lives. Please, don't abuse your loved ones! Respect your children as individual people with God-given rights. Don't yell at your kids. Be fair with them!
"Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged." -Colossians 3:21
Never hit or abuse anyone...
"Lay hands suddenly on no man, neither be partaker of other men's sins: keep thyself pure." -1st Timothy 5:22
Don't make promises you won't keep...
"Lie not one to another, seeing that ye have put off the old man with his deeds." -Colossians 3:9
Don't be stubborn!
"For rebellion is as the sin of witchcraft, and stubbornness is as iniquity and idolatry. -1st Samuel 15:23
We can change with the Holy Spirit's help!
"But we all, with open face beholding as in a glass the glory of the Lord, are changed into the same image from glory to glory, even as by the Spirit of the Lord." -2nd Corinthians 3:18
Notice the verse we just read; It tells us that the Holy Spirit of God will change us. Eventually, we ALL will change, willing or not. God will present us "faultless" before Himself in heaven...
"Now unto him that is able to keep you from falling, and to present you faultless before the presence of his glory with exceeding joy" -Jude 1:24
I don't know about you, but I want to change now to please the Lord. I want to lay up rewards in heaven by living for Jesus' sake and the gospels. Those believers who live in sin and hold out continually on God will receive few rewards in heaven. There will be bitter tears in Heaven when these immature believers see mature Christians standing with hundreds of people which they won to the Lord upon the earth. Some believers won't have as much as one convert in heaven to claim. Imagine living an entire life upon the earth as a believer and never winning one soul to the Lord Jesus Christ. How many people have you witnessed to lately?
We must change! To change, we must focus upon the Lord
Jesus Christ in His Word. God's Holy Spirit will guide us into all Truth
and the Truth will set us free. The bottom line is that we must want to
change. If we want to change, the Word of God WILL change us if we'll let
it. Do you hunger and thirst for righteousness in your life?
Do you want a closer walk with the God of the universe? Do you want to
mature in the Lord? You must grow up spiritually! Here's a
good place to start...
How to Grow in the Lord
"Wherefore laying aside all malice, and all guile, and hypocrisies, and envies, and all evil speakings, As newborn babes, desire the sincere milk of the word, that ye may grow thereby" -1st Peter 2:1-2
The Scriptures we just read are precious, they tell us how to "grow." Most people quote verse two without ever looking at verse one. We are to "lay aside" all of the immature criticizing, jealousy and hypocritical slandering that hinders our growth. Do you want to grow? Then your first step is to learn to "shut-up." James tells us that a man's religion is in vain if he bridles not his tongue. Pastor Jack Hyles (one of my heroes) has a chapter in his great book "Justice" called, "Instant Character." How do you get instant character? By keeping your mouth shut when your ready to gossip, slander or tear-down another person. More churches have been destroyed by gossip than all the communism in this world. The second thing we must do if we want to grow is to live in the Bible. How many believers do you know who "desire" the Word of God? I don't know too many. Most professed believers shutter at the mention of the Bible. I've learned a nifty little way over the years to get rid of people who love to talk, and talk, and talk (and you don't even have to borrow them any money). Simply start talk about the Word of God and watch them weasel away as fast as they can. Remember: you carry a Bible and the world will give you up, you don't need to give them up.
You can change because God promises to help you.
"Draw nigh to God, and he will draw nigh to you. Cleanse your hands, ye sinners; and purify your hearts, ye double minded." -James 4:8
Tears in Heaven: The Man Who Refused to Change
The man I told you about earlier is a professed Christian, runs his own ministry and has his office wall covered with degrees, licenses, certifications, etc. He is so enamored with his titles that he puts "Dr." and Rev." in front of every signature he writes. He is respected in his own neo-evangelical circle of dead-beat ministers. He's a sinister minister without question. Though perhaps he was once a gospel preacher (decades ago), now his ministry has deteriorated to nothing more than a mere soup-kitchen and social gathering. I dare say he's led anyone to the Lord in several years. Christ is only vaguely preached, the Bible watered-down to a mere social gospel. This is the disgraceful type of ministry that never does anything to influence people for Heaven or make an eternal difference. I don't know if the man is still alive anymore, but come to think of it... he is already dead. He died many years ago in his service for the Lord (he is the living dead). He may have some rewards in Heaven, but few souls saved. He had a form of godliness without the power thereof... from such turn away. I feel sorry for his family and pray for ALL of them. This foolish man, now old and broken, passed up a lifetime of opportunities to repent of his abusive ways. He never did change! He would often say,
"I'm too old to change."
OR
"I'm too set in my ways to change now."
OR
"I've been like this all of my life."
Again, he blamed his abusive ways on his health, his
problems, his age, his upbringing... excuses, excuses, excuses! He could do
everything that normal people could do (drive a car, balance a check-book, go
fishing, play chess, etc.), but when it came to properly treating other
people... he said he was too old and sick. He had a viscous hot-temper
which he never did gain the victory over. He became so angry one day that
he poured bleach over his wife's head while she sat crippled in a wheel-chair.
This was after 30 years of marriage to that poor woman. This guy is a
pastor, a preacher, and let me add... a poor excuse for a man; but he is still a
man that God loves and died on the cross for. How happy do you think he
will be at the Judgment Seat of Christ? He is in trouble with the Lord!
What About You?
I ask you friend, if you are in a state of stubbornness concerning areas of your life where you are IN THE WRONG, make the changes. Let God help you make those changes. The first step to dealing with ANY problem is to ADMIT that you have a problem. There is nothing undignified about admitting that you have a problem; on the contrary, it is admirable. It's not easy to admit when we're wrong is it? We ALL have that sinful pride (and your proving my point if you deny it). However, admitting that you have a problem is only HALF the battle. The second step is to focus on the cause of the problem (the roots feeding it) and decide how to systematically overcome it. It takes honor and decency to make things right, to RIGHT YOUR WRONGS. Honestly, most people could care less about making things right with those they have hurt or defrauded. This is sin! God holds each and every one of us accountable for how we treat others. Spiritual growth comes from reading and learning the Word of God, "as new born babes." This is essential to growing. Don't just read the Bible! Learn it! What does it mean? Reading is not going to benefit you much if you don't take it to heart and APPLY the truth to your life.
So admit your faults (sins) to yourself, decide to make the changes and then come up with ideas (a plan to see the changes through). What are you going to do about your problem? If you don't know, then you need to sit down and figure out a way to start CONQUERING your problem. For example: Do you have a hard time waking up? Then go to bed earlier if possible. Set 2 alarm clocks. Place the alarm clock across the room were you can't turn it off so easily. Make a promise to yourself never to hit the snooze alarm. Do you see what I am saying? These are ideas, a plan. Many marriages have ended in ruin because people don't make an effort to resolve their problems, they would rather see things get worse than to even consider CHANGING. This is how stubborn us humans can be.
So in closing, let me say once again...
The Christian Life is all about CHANGING!
Search your heart now. What areas of your life need changing? What would your wife like to see changed? What would your kids want to change? What would the Lord like to see changed in your life? I encourage you from this day forward to fellowship closer with the Lord Jesus Christ through His Spirit, seeking His will in your life. God speaks in a still, small voice. Will we listen? Will we be still long enough to know God?
"Be still, and know that I am God..." -Psalm 46:10
One last note: When it comes to our convictions, we should be unmovable! We should NOT change when it comes to doing what is right. I'm not talking about compromising here. I'm simply saying that if the shoe fits, wear it. In other words, if you've been abusive and unfair (especially towards your own family), then you need to change your ways before it's too late. It's ok to move (change) to the right (towards what is godly and ethical); but never to the left (away from what is right). For example: when it comes to my position on the blood of Jesus Christ, I am adamantly and unalterably anchored to the truth that Jesus' literal blood is absolutely essential to our salvation. Jesus' blood had to be shed and applied to the Mercy Seat in heaven. I'll NEVER change my mind about this. However, there have been times when I felt I needed to apologize to my wife for being unfair about something. I needed to change something that God had pointed out in my life. I have learned to regularly look for the areas of my life that need improvement, with a willingness to CHANGE what needs to be changed. This is important, which is why I have written this article for you. We should always be sensitive to the Holy Spirit's leading in everything, constantly focusing our minds upon the Truths of God's Holy Word.
In Jesus' name,
David J. Stewart
